There is a Zen story about two monks who were returning to their monastery. (I recall it as an Osho story) While walking ahead, one monk came to a river. On the bank there was a beautiful young girl. She was afraid to cross alone.
The first monk quickly looked away from her and crossed the river.
When he was on the other side he looked back, and to his horror he saw the other monk carrying the girl across the river on his shoulders.
The two monks continued their journey side by side. When they were just outside the monastery gates the first monk said to the other: ‘That was not good, that was against the rules, we monks are not supposed to touch women.’
The second monk replied: ‘I left her on the bank of the river hours ago, are you still carrying her?’
How much stuff do you carry around with you that one, you don;’t even realise you are carrying and more than that ‘stuff’ that you know is just story but you hang onto it because without that story you are not sure who you would be.
The ex-wife who took you for a ride. The boyfriend who cheated on you. The friend who never repaid that money they borrowed. The boss who stole your idea. Your sister who tore your favourite dress. Your parent who never understood you and blah di blah and on it goes.
Without this would you be lighter? Could you possibly create another more inspiring, funnier, happier, more engaging story?