We’ve all heard that seek and you shall find Which of course works well when we find our missing car keys but what about when we find stuff we’d rather not have
This came to mind last week when I was selling jewels at the market and this lovely girl came by. She was carrying a beautiful baby boy. She seemed so familiar, I was sure I had met her before.
She told me her name and days later, the puzzle solved itself.
We had worked for the same company as designers. At the market she had told me she was a single Mum, who was left holding the baby.
As one might expect memories were triggered and I recalled a random lunch where at some point we were discussing men, in that way that women do (And as men I am sure discuss the conundrum that is women.) I was in the middle of the breakup with my then husband I was likely meditating trying to keep my sanity, trying to figure out why this relationship that had been so filled with love and contrarily tension of the worst kind was broken.
I was becoming more and more aware of patterns and the part mine played in it and how we create our lives,
To cut a long story short I recall her saying that men always cheat on her and leave her,
She said My Dad did this so I kind of expect it. Why are men like this?
I said something like this. ‘Men aren’t. This has never been my experience. I’ve never had a man cheat on me or leave me.’
I had challenges (clearly) but this wasn’t one of them (My version is I have to do it all myself, nothing to do with my Dad who was a great taker carer of).
I suggested you find what you expect to find. Everyone there seemed perplexed with my answer, so I expanded with something like this.
‘You create it first in your head, and then you encounter it. Once you become aware that you co-create it.
You can break the pattern.
You first become aware of your part in it. Then of course the challenge and choice is to break the pattern.’
But first you must change the thinking that creates it
So as Mike Dooley says thought become things
What are you thinking?
Me, I’m thinking “We’re all in this together.”
And with regards men I’m thinking.
I need only one, who loves and adores me like I do him and we take great care of each other and help each other become the best version of whom we each want to be, (not who I want him to be or vice versa). And of course this time my challenge will be to allow him to do that.
Have great day
x
Eilish